1:54am

I’m so tired.  And I can’t sleep.  Too restless.  And I feel like a have a big knot in my stomach.  A little heartburn too.

I hate being sick.  I think there are two main reasons for this.

  1. I tend to be a hypochondriac, so anytime I get sick it feels like a death sentance
  2. I feel like I need to be everything to everyone all the time

I’m guessing I either had food poisoning or the “stomach flu.”  Vomiting and lots of diarrhea.  And then after all that cleansing, today is the first day since Tuesday that I’ve had a bowel movement.  I’m feeling a lot better, but still not back to normal.  And I’m questioning why.  When I get sick, it brings out the worst in my anxiety (#1 above) and depression (#2 above).  And believe me, I’ve dealt with both for several years.  It’s not fun.  So I guess you could say I’m feeling a bit off.  And because, for me, anxiety and depression have some physical symptoms it’s hard to tell whether I’m still sick or not.

As I’m typing this I’m falling asleep.  Gonna set the laptop aside for now and see what happens…

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.